Hatchet II [Blu-Ray]

Hatchet II exists, therefore it must have a reason for existing. I make this assertion on faith. This is a horror movie ― or, judging by its comically over-the-top violence and script that boils that Friday the 13th formula to its barest essence, a "horror movie." The plot is familiar: Victor Crowley (Kane "Jason" Hodder), the cursed, deformed swamp monster who you may or may not recall from Hatchet (2006) is on the loose and Marybeth (Danielle Harris), hyperventilating survivor of the last movie, has joined forces with one Reverend Zombie (Tony Todd) to stop him. Now, it must be said that Hatchet II is not a model of plot construction: the film drags for an eternity, as the Reverend recruits volunteers, and by the time the gang finally arrives at the swamp, we're well past the halfway point. From there, the many, many characters start being killed off almost immediately, without even the cursory character development permitted in the average Friday the 13th film. Of course, a movie like this is all about the kills, and they certainly are creative, but when a movie's opening scene involves a character being strangled by his intestines, one feels a little numb by the time somebody gets his face jammed into a boat motor near the end. Since Hatchet II exaggerates its characters and violence to the point that it's not remotely scary, is it funny? Amongst comparable movies, Hatchet II lacks the breakneck pace, momentum and originality of something like Evil Dead 2, never rises to the comic book level of Army of Darkness and never permits its audience to become un-ironically engrossed in its story like Shaun of the Dead or Drag Me to Hell. Is there anything funny about simply recreating slasher film clichés with a wink? Blu-Ray extras include a surprisingly candid audio commentary, where director Adam Green talks about the film's notoriously unsuccessful theatrical release (distributed unrated, it was pulled from theatres after just four days). Other extras include a half-hour documentary and the honestly titled "Hatchet II EPK."