Wrong Turn 4: Bloody Beginnings

If you're one of those people that are severely disappointed by the fact that you will not be able to waste your money on seeing a "new" Saw this Halloween, you've most likely wasted precious time on horror site forums demanding an origin story for the inbred killer cannibals in the Wrong Turn films as well. If so, you will be ecstatic to know that writer/director Declan O'Brien has answered your whiny pleas in an unremarkable direct-to-TV prequel to a series that had no business becoming a franchise in the first place. In the prologue, Wrong Turn 4: Bloody Beginnings delivers on its titular promise, showing viewers how Three Finger, Sawtooth and One-Eye became the flesh eating connoisseurs few have cared to know by showing their younger selves breaking out of an insane asylum and orchestrating a bloody hospital massacre in 1974. When the film jumps from 1974 to 2003 (the same year the first film took place), viewers are then introduced to a typical bunch of horny 20-something characters (no-name actors most likely cast from Winnipeg's Craigslist) get offed by the cannibal trio in gruesome ways while taking refuge in the abandoned asylum after getting lost on their way to a friend's cabin for winter break. Some get decapitated, others literally become human fondue, but all are expandable in this low-budget slasher tailor-made for far too easy to please gore hounds. If you enjoy voyeur-friendly lesbian sex scenes, cheap blood and can look past the fact the antagonists are wearing low-priced prosthetic masks, then Wrong Turn 4 is for you. If not, you're probably not even reading this review. The DVD features include 20 needless minutes of deleted scenes, making-of featurettes showcasing the cast and crew freezing their asses off while shooting, and a candid, somewhat entertaining commentary by the writer/director.