Taxi

First Joe Piscopo, then Tim Meadows and now Jimmy Fallon; Saturday Night Live is notorious for breeding funny comedians who leave the hit show in search of silver screen fame only to fail. And it's always the unknowing viewer that suffers. After failing to launch his musical career, Fallon decided to team up with Queen Latifah for one of the worst film couples since… actually Devito and Schwarzenegger were never this bad. Latifah plays Belle, an abrasive bike courier-cum-taxi driver who owns one of the most unrealistic automobiles in film history: a suped-up cab that with the flick of a switch has every super Bond feature save the heat seeking missiles. Fallon is Washburn, a no-brainer cop who consistently screws up every case thrown at him. After he is banned from driving, Washburn hooks up with Belle to crack a string of bank robberies. Of course, the bank robbers are played by tough as nails supermodels — a plot device that leads the film even further down the toilet when the models are forced to actually speak. With only one, maybe two laughs throughout the 97 minutes, Taxi proves it is the comedic soul mate of Catwoman, the other worst film of 2004. Unfortunately, there are extras that make this DVD even more intolerable. With the exception of one mildly funny deleted scene in which Fallon photographs a family and bullies an adolescent litterbug (which could have done wonders for the film), the exhausting five featurettes only prove that they were desperate to beef up the DVD to a horrible film. Plus: commentary. (Fox)