May 4
So my possum living in the grill had babies pic.twitter.com/Jc5iDkhmL3
— Cat Cozzi (@cozzi_cat) May 4, 2019
Now that's a t-shirt cannon if I've ever seen one pic.twitter.com/0Myp9Oaxq8
— Nathan H. Rubin (@NathanHRubin) May 4, 2019
How BET be censoring the curse words pic.twitter.com/tNPEHlzabM
— THAT GIRL FROM INSTAGRAM (@KhadiDon) May 4, 2019
May 5
— Bootleg Stuff (@Bootleg_Stuff) May 5, 2019
Lmaoo y'all Barbers need to cut this shit out 😂😂😂🤦🏾♂️ pic.twitter.com/NeItJxsLI3
— BlackEntertainment🗣 (@IlovebeinBlack) May 5, 2019
My girl Brienne outside in a housecoat. I hate dick. That's what dick does. It has you outside in the cold ass North in a housecoat asking a one handed dude where he's going.
— Auntie Rai of Castamere (@yay_itsrai) May 6, 2019
Cersei: Any last words?
— Arya Morgendorffer (@vinabean) May 6, 2019
Me: Jaime said the puss hit different when it doesn't share your DNA. Word on the street is he fucking this girl from Tarth. Big thick bitch that could beat your ass. She'd knock the bowl cut off you. I think she preg—*decapitated*
May 6
The only people who believe Trump's a Christian are the one who believed Obama was a Muslim.
— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) May 6, 2019
"Cersei, your enemies have stupidly approached within range of our giant crossbows and with one volley we can wipe all of them out, end this war, and the iron throne will be yours forever."
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) May 6, 2019
Cersei: "Behead her personal assistant."
How all #GameOfThrones fans want the show to end pic.twitter.com/deiiH6HdUx
— GoT Things (@GoTthings_) May 6, 2019
go off sis #MetGala pic.twitter.com/LjYrNff41D
— ziwe (@ziwe) May 6, 2019
Gendry really proposed after one night of sex. He might as well jump on the next Drake song with that attitude.
— Zito (@_Zeets) May 6, 2019
Game of Thrones for 8 years has been "Winter is coming" this and "army of the dead" that. Now their big finisher is a war with Cersei and her pirate fuck buddy? This is like falling in love with someone, then finding out they like Ska music.
— Matt Fernandez (@FattMernandez) May 6, 2019
Sansa always scheming pic.twitter.com/WuX1gQsMQZ
— ALEX 👽🦈🖤 (@a_big_skeleton) May 6, 2019
INCREDIBLE HULK: hulk smash
— Swim Jeans👖 (@ShortSleeveSuit) May 6, 2019
UNCREDIBLE HULK: hulk think ufo kill jfk
Invite Ric Flair to the #MetGala you cowards pic.twitter.com/uqzkrVhew0
— Bryancé Knowles-Carter-Yang (@bryanyang) May 6, 2019
The Met Gala seems like something that Bane would attack
— Dan O'Sullivan (@Bro_Pair) May 7, 2019
"I FORGOT MY KEYS, SANDRA" pic.twitter.com/MVKsuIHoQ5
— Paul Bronks (@SlenderSherbet) May 6, 2019
Every person at the Met Gala should be a Mortal Kombat character pic.twitter.com/nIAAG1yvq3
— Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) May 6, 2019
May 7
@WorldWideWob PJ Tucker with no regard for this equipment manager pic.twitter.com/dYcC95sD52
— Jake Kusko (@Jake_Kusko) May 7, 2019
I have zero idea what is happening here but I have to share it pic.twitter.com/itS0uclVgR
— Curtis Remarc (@CurtisRemarc) May 7, 2019
— Jesse Hawken (@jessehawken) May 7, 2019
May 8
maybe if we call schools wombs republicans will start caring about the kids inside them
— Sarah Beattie (@nachosarah) May 8, 2019
Everyone who works in customer service should legally be allowed to fight one customer a year. pic.twitter.com/E0PRDmylJa
— leo (@LeonardCowalski) May 8, 2019
did...did the murderer write this? https://t.co/azoYoPoqYH
— Hannah (@ruthyoest) May 8, 2019
a truck cut me off earlier and I've been on hold with 1-800-EAT-SHIT for over an hour now
— dan mentos (@DanMentos) May 8, 2019
I cannot, and I cannot stress this enough, stress this enough
— Rachel Wenitsky (@RachelWenitsky) May 8, 2019
"To prove I'm not dumb at business I will admit to tax fraud" pic.twitter.com/xxBilQpIrI
— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) May 8, 2019
May 9
On my life I thought Thanos was the DJ.. https://t.co/g6bZulx9Vz
— Derrick 🎳 (@fatherrayo) May 9, 2019
found my new favorite instagram today pic.twitter.com/9IbUHC4az1
— 🇲🇮🇰🇴 (@mikejonesfl) May 9, 2019
If a fetus is a person at 6 weeks pregnant, is that when the child support starts? Is that also when you can't deport the mother because she's carrying a US citizen? Can I insure a 6 week fetus and collect if I miscarry? Just figuring if we're going here we should go all in.
— Carliss Chatman (@carlissc) May 9, 2019
Someone pointed out that Simpsons characters' eyes are normally connected but a strip of flesh spontaneously appears between them when they wear sunglasses and now I can't stop thinking about it pic.twitter.com/P3B5Y5Kq2A
— Zack Budryk (@BudrykZack) May 9, 2019
I don't care who caught the bouquet. I know who I'd marry. https://t.co/8IdFUToH82
— Anthony Jeselnik (@anthonyjeselnik) May 10, 2019
I wonder how he'll celebrate his victory? https://t.co/fD4yYWkoav
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) May 9, 2019
👇👇👇👇👇👇 pic.twitter.com/n4e4GtDtZu
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) May 9, 2019
May 10
Here we can see a truck spreading homosexuality. pic.twitter.com/DjWFGIGdSO
— Stay-at-home Unicorn (@JoshCoutu) May 10, 2019
Ouch! Mayor @Pete Buttigieg responds to @realDonaldTrump slam that he is "Alfred E Neuman" —"I had to Google that..I guess it's a generational thing." pic.twitter.com/ZL11noISYL
— Carla Marinucci (@cmarinucci) May 11, 2019
Stop letting nerds tell you how to play basketball....
— David West (@D_West30) May 11, 2019
Steph showing Emilia Clarke how to end a series.
— Craig Malamut (@mutsackcraig) May 11, 2019
I created the entire universe for the sake of one subgroup of one species on one planet in one solar system in one galaxy.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) May 10, 2019
a friend of mine sent me the best TikTok ever made happy Friday pic.twitter.com/VDmER4YHdH
— Oliver Sachgau (@sachgau) May 10, 2019