This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: December 7, 2018
This is why you shouldn't put Christmas lights on Palm Trees pic.twitter.com/XbMlGjgUI0— Stone Cold (@stonecold2050) December 2, 2018
THROW THE STICK YOU MONSTER https://t.co/d69Tgoc2Ub— Derrick 🎒 (@_ayosworldd) December 1, 2018
My sister brought the Grinch an onion yesterday and I about died 😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/BJn7mypxOz— Spokesmayne (@Spokesmayne) December 1, 2018
Quite possibly the worst timing in the history of television pic.twitter.com/VL0D1TMS1G— Ivan Rapoport (@IvanRapoport) December 2, 2018
How Charlie Chaplin Accomplished The Stunts In Modern Time pic.twitter.com/qloKXTfzJW— RΛMIN NΛSIBOV (@RaminNasibov) December 2, 2018
Oh, the beauty of seeing a Canadian baby being born. pic.twitter.com/SBmO8FBMK1— Lloyd Legalist (@LloydLegalist) December 2, 2018
My friend said this is "getting back out there" after a long relationship I'm dead. pic.twitter.com/BqPpnF61nH— QUEPID🤪💜 (@_Daminator) December 2, 2018
Leave me outta this https://t.co/oWt7sh0UGz— Scott Free (@gbabyflt) December 3, 2018
This is priceless. This imbecile made a typo that created a link. Click on it and see what opens. 🤣— Mike Prevost 🇫🇮 (@MikePrevost3) December 3, 2018
Whoever did this, I will hoist several mugs of good Finnish microbrews this evening in your honour. 🍺🍻 https://t.co/sM0iPTnprq
There's more. There were three copies of the new NAFTA deal to sign. During the signing ceremony, President Trump appears to sign in the wrong place on one of them.— Muhammad Lila (@MuhammadLila) December 3, 2018
This is the exact moment everyone realized, individually with their reactions, including Prime Minister Trudeau. pic.twitter.com/Wd3CEtV73D
You are going to want to take a seat here jackass...— lisastark35 (@lisastark351) December 4, 2018
Your dad raped your mom, and cheated on her.
Your brother cheated on his wife and left the mother of his 5 kids.
You steal money from St. Jude.
Kelly Anne herself is making a mockery of America.
Sit the fuck down https://t.co/83ohYDBKmr
Lmaoo he really did his last dance before going to jail 😂😂💀😂💀 pic.twitter.com/l9QLHySluK— AlexWithDaTea☕️ (@ILoveBeinBlack) December 4, 2018
*Obama helps save the auto industry*— Adam Best (@adamcbest) December 4, 2018
Rust Belt voter: "Obama didn't do anything for us!"
*Trump policies cause GM to close factories, cut 14K jobs*
Rust Belt voter: "It isn't Trump's fault I lost my job!"
This is your brain on right-wing propaganda.🤦♂️
You know the world is in a great place when our largest corporations are literally using the same strategies as Nathan for You https://t.co/NpxVTORPDh— nathan fielder (@nathanfielder) December 3, 2018
KIDNAPPER: *hits me across the face* nobody's ever gonna find u— Bob Vulfov (@bobvulfov) December 3, 2018
[duolingo owl busts through the door and shoots the kidnapper]
ME: holy shit u saved me
OWL: u've got more spanish to learn. u'll die when i say u can die
Lot of people criticizing this, but in fairness, the best way to honor a Republican is to deny Americans a vital government service they rely on https://t.co/K3UPHTfecZ— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) December 4, 2018
The most intense fight I've ever seen pic.twitter.com/TCXXO98ijp— Guy (@apiecebyguy) December 4, 2018
a pitch-perfect representation of a male vs female employee's expected level of work for the same position pic.twitter.com/50kKmzx8vH— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) December 4, 2018
What the hell do you mean "nobody"? I'm all over that fancy shit. "Did y'all know most scenes are made up of different shots and cut together in some room? It's crazy. Anyway, to present the figurine for best editing and whatnot, here's Meryl Streep and Sinbad." https://t.co/oYML4lyGAQ— George Wallace (@MrGeorgeWallace) December 4, 2018
I'm not sure this is helping, PETA pic.twitter.com/CWQYh6TbPK— a very pixelated boat christmas (@pixelatedboat) December 5, 2018
Savage -- Morning Joe put together a montage of Trump wandering away from public events when wasn't supposed to, set to the Allman Brothers' "Ramblin' Man" pic.twitter.com/5IAOiC76ce— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) December 4, 2018
Did she change her name? pic.twitter.com/szPFd22PMN— Todd Hollow Man (@todd_holloman) December 5, 2018
what the FUCK pic.twitter.com/SCtlCbt9Wi— Ian Walker (@iantothemax) December 5, 2018
who wants to see some shit that is dumb as hell pic.twitter.com/APosPTsw6E— jake (@callmeshitto) December 6, 2018
He's not in the casket?!? https://t.co/jG5LhT7h0d— h. jon benjamin (@HJBenjamin) December 5, 2018
White evangelicals:— Bishop Talbert Swan (@TalbertSwan) December 5, 2018
Obama - 1 wife, 26 yrs, 2 kids by his wife, church goer, activist, politician, no extramarrital scandals - ANTICHRIST
Trump - 3 wives, 5 kids by 3 women, abortions by mistresses, non church goer, casino owner, multiple extramarital scandals - GOD'S ANOINTED
Is Kevin Hart hoping we'll read this and say, "He can't be a homophobe, he's in love with a man!!!!"? https://t.co/YDHj9NOkMY— Emily Heller (@MrEmilyHeller) December 7, 2018
If Donald Trump wanted Hillary Clinton locked up, he should have hired her to work on his campaign.— MyChickenDinner (@MyChickenDinner) December 6, 2018
when ur really super-duper Christian and all the Evangelicals love you pic.twitter.com/sluQ1i9nbh— ᴿealfarmacist (@real_farmacist) December 6, 2018
I think Siri and Alexa should host the Oscars.— Wanda Sykes (@iamwandasykes) December 7, 2018
Good morning David. Condemning conversion therapy & those who support it is not "stupid sh*t," it's being on the side of kids' human rights & in-line with the American Academy of Pediatrics. If looking at me drives you to drink or think of jack-o-lanterns, please carve a pumpkin. https://t.co/ff5EYDGxCH— Chelsea Clinton (@ChelseaClinton) December 7, 2018
"Fuck Me? Fuck YOU: A Counter Report" https://t.co/a1SV6NXzSg— Patrick Monahan (@pattymo) December 7, 2018