For a second I thought she cast a spell that made her hat change colors
Caitlin Clark after Tyrese Haliburton 3 pointer
Phew, just in time.
Nothing but crazy times in Springfield! @kylegordon101 and @audtrullinger1 appear on an all-new episode of #TheSimpsons this Sunday on @FOXTV. Next day on @hulu!
A great example of why writers rooms are essential. This entire sequence was written by a group of writers in one afternoon None of us would've come up with ANY of this on our own We inspired each other I know the strike is over but there still aren't enough writers rooms
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$6 and the burrito was the size of a new born
Seat mate on yesterday’s flight said he knew me from somewhere and I was like probably not and this dude says ‘did you wear a black tutu and a Slayer tee to see the Cocteau Twins in Detroit in 1990?’ I was like, well fuk yes that was me! He said he never forgot my fit. Same, man
Steve Albini, Gen X 👑
The French president is stepping in after the country's birth rate hit its lowest point since World War II. itv.com/news/2024-05-1…
norm macdonald invented hating the canucks with one perfect reason
fixed it
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Man This The Funniest Shit I’ve Seen This Week 😂😂😂😂😂
F.A.N.- Drake Step this way - R. Kelly Hey, Hey, Hey - B. Cosby Naw man. Kendrick is ridiculous lmao
Like there has got to be crack in this song lmfaooo
Drake fans will never hear Drake’s Music the same way After the Kendrick Lamar Battle 😂😂
I'm not sure I've ever seen anyone take a harder L culturally.
it’d be so funny if drakes final track was just him being like “uhhh I think you meant HALEY JOEL OSMENT” but didn’t address anything else
His life flashed before his eyes
First Anthony Edwards?
Anthony Edwards wants to be talked about as “the first Anthony Edwards — not the next Michael Jordan.” “He maybe got a mix of Michael Jordan in him… but I got a trey ball. That makes me a little different than Michael Jordan.” This morning on @GMA:
this keyser söze mf
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this is one of those situations where even after reading a very plain and clear caption telling me what to expect, actually seeing/hearing it was still unexpected
Sex noises interrupt the Luka Dončić postgame press conference in Oklahoma City. His face 🤣🤣🤣 x.com/OhYesHeDid24/s…
Not being dramatic when I say this is the best photo on Earth
Australian people seeing the northern lights:
Norway
I’m starting a support group for people who didn’t see the Northern Lights last night. We are valid. Stop erasing our existence Any joiners This is our flag
brain convinced me this was a still from Team America for a second
he standing there like he the real one🤣🤣🤣
Installing a bidet at home was life changing but unfortunately it's transformed pooping on company time from a small proletarian victory into yet another grueling humiliation of inadequate working conditions.
Me at work doing the bare minimum while being the most impactful.
Kendrick performing at LV fashion show pic.x.com/LfW3L3xgqI
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this some shit you’d see in squidward city
More serious innovation
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Embarrassing but predictable how all the funny stuff is coming from the Ireland side
The New York / Ireland portal bouta start a war😭😭😭
2 days later
THE PORTAL: a visual bridge connecting New York City to Dublin A public technology sculpture known as The Portal was unveiled this morning in New York City’s ’s Flatiron neighborhood. The sculpture has a real-time, visual live stream connecting New York City to Dublin, Ireland.
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there was actually a pretty famous carpenter who performed miracles
Even though a good carpenter cannot create miracles, he can do miraculous things. pic.x.com/nPwKBAoCfW
well the universe said free palestine.
To say I am blown away is an understatement, What a night! Glastonbury Tor and the Aurora...incredible.
Thats fair miranda
Miranda Cosgrove reflects on stalker who lit himself on fire and fatally shot himself: ‘I just don’t feel super safe’ trib.al/qtC1kxs
Trump: Silence of the lamb! The late great Hannibal Lecter. It is a wonderful man.
At a New Jersey rally, Donald Trump made repeated reference to “the late, great Hannibal Lecter” and confused Jimmy Carter with Jimmy Connors—forcing a difficult conversation about Biden’s age and mental acuity.
Fun fact: among the provinces, only Newfoundland has a higher unemployment rate than Alberta.
Alberta is #BOOMING. Our amazing province is the best place to live, work and raise a family in Canada. Ready for change? #Alberta is calling! albertaiscalling.ca #cdnpoli #abpoli #energy #oilandgas #Toronto #Vancouver #Ottawa #Halifax
This is an all-time community note.
Jokic is a dirty ass player only way they can win clearly purposely all night doing illegal screens and the refs let them get away with it pic.x.com/pgDcCWnwKF
chet chasing him with his arms out like how the monsters would chase the kids in scooby doo is so fucking funny to me 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Lively running away so they don’t foul him 😭 pic.x.com/3krClG2U0i
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The bad guys in Home Alone when they have to outsmart an 8 year old
How awesome is Anthony Edwards that he can make you root for a team that also features Karl Anthony Towns and Rudy Gobert? It’s like buying an album where Bruce Springsteen is backed up by Imagine Dragons.
Maya Rudolph continues the tradition of honoring her mom Minnie Riperton when she hosts SNL by recreating her album covers ❤️
Breakfast In Bed Served To Mom Who Just Got Eaten Out bit.ly/3yoF6UZ
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ai can’t do this. Can’t create this. This beauty. Raw
MAGAs biggest enemy is Community Notes 🤣
Wait....what kind of good time?
Finding a white person’s dog would fix all my financial problems.
this remains one of my favorite pieces of internet cultural criticism
put a fried egg on my croque monsieur to make it a croque madame and now jk rowling is outside my house yelling
he’s been on a press tour for weeks and not one single journalist has brought up his genocidal views. comedians are still treating him like he’s normal (bc they are famously spineless). the only people whove treated him with the disrespect he deserved were these students ❤️
A large group of students walked out on Jerry Seinfeld as he began his commencement speech at Duke University this weekend → cos.lv/Gh1Z50RCS6u
Bob's my nickname. Robert is my nicholasname.
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enjoy vampire weekend? thank a vampire labor union.
me, driving at 3am: so fun cool adventure me, seeing another car at 3am: what the fuck are u up to u shady bastard
Hahahahahhaha someone parked their cybertruck at the coffee shop and every single person who comes in is talking about how dumb it looks and the guy is sitting there fuming this is the best morning ever
It is so wild how Facebook started as a way for Harvard incels to play smash or pass and now it’s just grandmas getting scammed by robots. What a journey.
Special comes out tomorrow on YouTube
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"why am i fucking listening to you like youve done something" is the reaction everyone everywhere should have all the time to 99.99999% of punditry
Bill Burr ruthlessly roasts Maher for his bullshit takes on Palestine/Israel and states that he supports the student protestors
Burr rules, he did the same thing to Rogan about the vaccines -- we need him to go on every idiot's show and remind them that they're just a dumbass comic
Bill Burr ruthlessly roasts Maher for his bullshit takes on Palestine/Israel and states that he supports the student protestors
I asked my 8yo if he liked my sleeveless blouse, he said "the color's fine, but I don't like public armpits" 😭 Public. Armpits. It's going straight to Goodwill
I was at the park this morning and some kid said, “Hey dad, do you want to play ‘is it a fart or a shart’?” And the dad said, “That is a game for HOME!”
I believe that belongs to Mr. Gilmore!
7’4” Zach Edey running the 3/4 court sprint at the combine
every ex-smoker spends one minute a day fantasizing about an alternate reality where smoking is good for you
Hit by another car? Hit by a meteor?
UPDATE: The Justice Department has been found dead of suspected suicide
BREAKING: The Justice Department says Boeing has violated an agreement that shielded it from prosecution after the 737 Max crashes. apnews.com/article/boeing…
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can’t even show your bouncy big naturals to the dubliners inside the NYC portal anymore… because of woke!
the portal in new york and dublin has been shut down because some girl FLASHED the people on the other side
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Oh hey, Maggie Haberman sat on extremely important information about Trump for years to save for her book, again. Anyways:
Insane to have a joke that's like 8 jokes like 20 seconds.
Gun to to your head, what is the *best* Simpsons joke? However you wanna define it; pics, GIFs, clips, and overwrought explanations welcome.
I really like Bill Burr's whole arc. If you watch his specials chronologically, it's basically about a guy whose functional marriage is slowly making him less insane
will never resist an excuse to bring back this video
I've known some dudes who looked like Jokic, only shorter, and every single one of these guys was ticklish - Rudy has gotta start tickling
if Abe Lincoln was a coke dealer at the U of Miami
Going to be tough to top the Titans' 2023 schedule release 😭 🎥: @Titans
Cannot wait for the Ravens-Chiefs rematch in Week 1 🍿💥 🎥: @NFL pic.x.com/HtsIfPI0Kw
thank you, person wearing 7 pounds of hair gel who plays the only position on the football field where you legally can’t get touched, for this rousing talk on masculinity
#Chiefs K Harrison Butker with a message to young men around the world: “Be unapologetic in your masculinity. Fight against the cultural emasculation of men. Do hard things. Never settle for what is easy.” (via: @dannydeurbina) pic.x.com/1z2BXI132C
BREAKING: Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker challenging Jets quarterback Aaron Rodgers for position of NFL player most in need of shutting the fuck up.
You mean to tell me that TOM BRADY made a career decision without thinking about how it would affect his family?!?!?
zendaya in challengers
Everything is 30 rock or Veep now
that one politician from missouri but better
Venue idea
me after 2 vodka crans
President Lula of Brazil said, in a recent public event, that he is becoming more modern and that he will kiss everyone regardless of gender.
nobody wants to work anymore
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We’re electing the world’s most expensive coke habit as PM
Danielle Smith claims wildfires would never have happened if trees refused to get vaccinated thebeaverton.com/2023/05/daniel…
I feel like we moved past the “a worm ate part of RFK Jr’s brain and died bc the tissue was lined with so much mercury from all the tuna he eats constantly” news a little fast. A lot going on, but that’s one of the most insane things I’ve ever learned about another person.
i'm crying most celebrities are too scared to ever open their mouths abt anything meanwhile ethel cain is out here putting herself on government watchlists..let her cook
Ethel Cain addresses Joe Biden’s support for the Israeli military: “we need to bring back assassinations”
Mustard on the beat hoe
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Please green screen him in, don't even animate him
Danny DeVito says he would play Wario in a ‘SUPER MARIO BROS MOVIE’ sequel. (Source: youtu.be/NAn3Q61q8Io?si…)
imagine seeing ronald mcdonald eating his first cheeseburger…would be mental x
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I didn’t even get to the antisemitic part. He really tried to corner every market.
Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker gave a sexist, antisemitic speech in which he falsely claimed Congress “passed a bill where stating something as basic as the Biblical teaching of who killed Jesus could land you in jail." Watch: rollingstone.com/politics/polit…
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Going for a run in your mid-thirties
A hundred years ago Nikola Jokic would have been the top blacksmith in Sombor and a hundred years from now he would be a guy kept alive to shovel uranium fuel pellets into Omnium the planet sized supercomputer. It's only in this specific era that we get to see him play basketball
Draymond has been added to Inside the NBA to make it easier for all of us to let go. One final masterstroke from the best studio show in history.
Always worth repeating
the artist painted him in HELL, i’m crying 😭😭
The first official painted portrait of King Charles III since his coronation has been unveiled at Buckingham Palace.
Tupperware after you put pasta in it once
This bastard probably loves Mondays too. Sickening.
A woman named Grandma
Grandma, 55, becomes first swimmer ever to complete grueling 29.7 mile swim from San Francisco to Farallon Islands after 17 hour marathon through freezing waters filled with great white sharks trib.al/ZcZk59B
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every sex scene is necessary to me, a pervert
They’ll literally release a chemical cloud over the earth before doing anything that might threaten capital
"Bill Gates is backing the first high-altitude experiment of one radical climate change solution. Creating a massive chemical cloud that can cool the earth. It’s called solar geoengineering and it’s highly controversial.” ~ CNBC pic.x.com/8iKTWrAgCr
You’re a slave to capitalism.
Um, literally NO Canadian ever says that.
Okay but that was an elite parallel park
respect the game but he needs to work on his caressing
Bro is playing both sides.
The fact that I had to check @laurenboebert’s Twitter page to see if this was real speaks volumes about her.
“Olive oil is going up again why” My brother our countries are lighting olive trees ablaze and murdering families in hopes of discouraging people from remaining in their homes and on their traditional lands That’s why
Truly incredibly 4 part story
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Checking to make sure they’re both alright before laughing for 11 uninterrupted minutes at BRIANNA CHICKENFRY
Country singer Zach Bryan and girlfriend Brianna Chickenfry nearly died when vehicle flipped in bloody car crash trib.al/mPIucbY
Larry David himself couldn’t come up with a funnier bit than this
I bet this shit hits so hard if you’re stupid
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Need every Dunkin in the country to fly their flags at half-mast
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"Huge Netflix star"? I don't even need to read the article.
Boebert’s teenage son, Tyler Boebert, was in court 7 days ago, without his mother and without a lawyer, but here she is in New York, in court, for Donald Trump.
We asked Lauren Boebert to autograph a “Beetlejuice The Musical” playbill outside the courthouse today.