happy international women’s day
brands running low on International Women's Day ideas
Celebrate International Women's Day by interrupting men with your unsolicited opinions and taking credit for their work. If they get upset about it, be sure to tell them that they sound hysterical and should probably smile more.
That’s great Linda, this is the guy you work for
I'm a product of a home that raised strong women – thanks, Mom and Dad! That's why on this #IWD (and every day) I proudly stand tall in my 4-inch heels. At X, we champion free speech, where everyone can stand up for their beliefs safely. Silencing voices only hinders learning and…
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This was done by an artist who won an Emmy for it you jpeg avatar dipshit.
severance is the best new tv show ive watched in years great use of AI visual weirdness in the title sequence too
Last night hubby and I shared a bottle of wine and went over our expenses. It’s not our taxes that are stretching our budget. It’s not our heat. It’s not our insurance. It’s communications and groceries. The two things owned by biggest monopolies in Canada.
As much as I’m against everything he stands for you just have to accept some things- The man was born to post
Trump just posted this video on his official Instagram.
The GOP is very confused about how putting a young woman in the kitchen and coaching her to sound like a breathy porn ad for their rebuttal backfired on them.
you all are bad x.com/Tarquin_Helmet…
Sen. Katie Britt. Proud graduate of Gene Cousineau's acting class
Katie Britt: Inside the Actors Studio (Points to @FrankConniff for the idea)
Most actors would kill for Katie Britt's range
THE ROMAN EDIT PLZZZ 💀
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same old story
Katie Britt’s attempt to be relatable while delivering whackadoodle remarks from a barren kitchen reminds me of Nancy Mace’s campaign ad on inflation, where she absolutely WRECKS this fried egg.
Just want to thank Katie Britt and the Republican Party for gifting us the most fun day on this website since Four Seasons Total Landscaping
The coworker Elaine shows her New Yorker comic to is like 90% of twitter
“sir there’s a second wembanyama”
Streets saying Oscar Wembanyama is now 6’8 (he was 6’5). He turns 17 in 12 days and is signed to ASVEL’s junior club.
March 9
There is absolutely no reason that “spring forward” shouldn’t happen on a Monday at 4pm.
bf thought that sufjan stevens was just cat stevens after he changed his name when he converted to islam
That’s Bret the Hitman Hart
Scientists at Nottingham Trent University have reconstructed this 3D model of how Adam, the first human depicted in the Book Of Genesis might have looked.
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Been giggling at this for hours
All this tells me is even the rich kids said fuck this 😭 this is the perfect person to do this cos they have the resources to be protected.
Btw that’s a Mulberry Cara backpack. They were just shy of a grand new when the collab went on sale in 2014. They still sell for over £500 on Vestiaire.
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This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen. What the fuck are we doing here
A picture showing aid drops and Israeli airstrikes targeting civilian areas in northern Gaza at the same time.
My dad is truly a ridiculous individual 😂
March 10
Some people can't handle that we rapped about reality.
I'm pretty Flight of the Conchords sympathetic but 00s comedy gangsta rap parodies were a really dark time for the culture
WILL. JE. SUIS
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So just to be clear here - in the Public Relations industry, a “kill notification” is the coup de grâce of the media circuit. For AP to issue this update, means that something is TERRIBLY wrong. Think of it as a Cat. 5 cyclone. This is literally a death blow to any press source.
Multiple photo agencies such as AP and Reuters have pulled the new photo of Kate Middleton shared by Kensington Palace from circulation amid concerns that it was ‘manipulated.’ Associated Press said the photo was being ‘killed’: “At closer inspection, it appears that the source…
I’m beginning to wonder if corporations making record profits like Loblaws and General Mills are purposely keeping prices high to keep people upset with our Liberal/Democrat govts in Can/US to help Conservative/Republican parties win. They know inflation gets people mad.
Same night Polanski got a standing ovation
21 years ago, Michael Moore was boo'd at the Oscars for condemning the 2003 invasion of Iraq pic.x.com/0jwjiUoaH5
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Hayao Miyazaki didn't go to the #Oscars in 2003 because of his opposition to the catastrophic inhumanity of the Iraq War. if only we could know why he wasn't at the 2024 Oscars either.
Unable to attend in person: Hayao Miyazaki, Wes Anderson, Godzilla
Past Lives presupposes that two writers can remain happily and peaceably married, while Anatomy of a Fall suggests that a marriage between two writers will inevitably lead to murder and/or suicide.
i’m so glad i love barbie because i can’t imagine being a miserable little bitch about something as fun as this
Ryan Gosling performing “I’m Just Ken” at the #Oscars. pic.x.com/wdDIoAqjWX
I'm serious when I say I'll never be over this. #Oscars2024
This is the Avengers of awkward conversations. The Shaq & Kobe of you gotta be kidding me.
Me as a kid trying to ignore the men’s underwear aisle while shopping with my mom:
When someone asks me what you need to catch bugs in Animal Crossing:
the fact Billie Eilish has won more oscars than Martin Scorsese
John Mulaney had a very strong opinion on who should have won this year's Oscar for Best Picture: 1989's "Field of Dreams." #Oscars #Oscars2024 trib.al/dc3ysvP
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Guys I love Marty too but every one of his late period movies are about how America has a black heart and no soul and has always been this way and will never be fixed. Not hard to figure out why he’s not winning Oscars.
it’s so wild that Downey’s narrative is that he was a massive talent and huge drug addict who got cleaned up, made a comeback and then got stuck in the biggest movies of all time for a decade, requiring another comeback
“My song ‘The Fire Inside’ from the movie ‘Flamin’ Hot’” is a Jenna Maroney line
Tim Robbins shows up in public for the first time in twenty years, says De Niro should’ve won, casually drops that White people are ontologically evil, immediately leaves
is Oppenheimer/Godzilla Minus One the first time a movie and its sequel both won Oscars in the same year?
THEY JUST GAVE ‘BEST EDITING’ TO A THREE HOUR MOVIE IT SHOULD HAVE WON ‘MOST EDITING’
Al Pacino just going “uh yeah Oppenheimer” lmaooo perfect ending no notes
Al Pacino stumbled out of bed, walked onstage, opened an envelope, and said the name of the winner. This is the ideal award presenter. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.
she needed to punch a baby
Emma Stone at the #Oscars. pic.x.com/v83nDVYfxa
stop giving Poor Things these damn awards cause now my grandma wanna watch it
The Curse was a documentary
Emma Stone beating a Native American woman for Best Actress the same year as The Curse is one of the funniest things to ever happen
this is how emma stone looked when they called her name
it’s not misogynistic to point out that lily gladstone gave a better performance than emma and that the academy heavily marketed this ceremony around the fact that she could potentially make history only to give it to a white woman btw
March 11
Emma Stone’s Vision
Martin Scorsese at the Oscars leaning over to Francesca and saying:
good morning new favorite video just dropped
its official ryan gosling is better than eminem
anthony hopkins had 16 minutes of screen time in the silence of the lambs and won best actor so why are we holding lily to a different standard
Lily Gladstone has 56 minutes of screen time across the 3 hour and 29 minute drama. Her co-star Leonardo DiCaprio has one hour and 49 minutes. That's hard to sell as a "co-lead" situation, especially with supporting actor nominee Robert DeNiro having only nine minutes less than…
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Blink 182, the Jackass crew, and every other famous guy getting naked for comedic effect my entire childhood = good ol' raunchy dude comedy John Cena doing it today = Illuminati humiliation ritual to feminize society
The most underrated bit of the night. “What do you mean?” Isn’t that funny on its own but the way Kate McKinnon said it made it hilarious #Oscars #Oscars2024
not even a remotely controversial take. the man is hot. always has been. probably always will be.
Kinda rocks how Keaton is just instantly in character. I feel like only he and Adam West were the only two ever committed enough where it felt like they actually believed they were Batman on some level lol
Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito berate Michael Keaton on beating them up as Batman. “There he is! You’ve got a lot of nerve!”
why were they looking at him like that😭
Diana would've been sharp as fuck with Photoshop.
These are my favourite days on this app; when a scandal that nobody actually cares about breaks but the meme game is strong and everyone's firing on all cylinders.
100% not photoshopped #KateMiddleton
hey royals, amateur PR guy here, have you considered putting out something normal instead of maximally concerning
Like many amateur photographers, I do occasionally experiment with editing. I wanted to express my apologies for any confusion the family photograph we shared yesterday caused. I hope everyone celebrating had a very happy Mother’s Day. C
Kate Middleton “Occasionally experiments with editing.”
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They forgot to match the bricks 😭😭😭
you expect us to believe the princess of wales is sitting there fucking around in adobe in her spare time. i’m convinced 90% of kensington palace’s pr strategy is believing that the public is fucking stupid
Kate Middleton addresses controversy surrounding edited photo issued yesterday: “Like many amateur photographers, I do occasionally experiment with editing.”
At dinner my husband said, “Can you give me the short version on why Kate Middleton is trending?” No sir I cannot.
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Kate goes missing. AI doctored image drops. Now his side piece is getting a PR run. THERE ARE SIGNS
British people tell you that they live in a real country and then introduce you to someone called the Marchioness of Cholmondeley
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The reason we are all so obsessed with finding Kate Middleton is because we grew up with Super Mario Bros and were literally trained to save the princess
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All I'm saying is if I'm a nearby country previously occupied by the British, the queen is dead, the monarchy is tanking public trust via photoshop, the spare is in California making podcasts, and the real government blew through 3 prime ministers in a year + brexit, I'm invading
Boeing absolutely having a wager with Kate Middleton on who can have the worst PR this week
Former Boeing employee John Barnett, who raised concerns over the company’s production standards, has been found dead from a “self-inflected wound”, BBC reports. In the days before his death, he had been giving evidence in a whistleblower lawsuit against the company.
Piers Morgan's wife Celia Walden when it was Duchess Meghan : Meghan can't demand privacy for her new born baby. When it's Kate Middleton : The shameful speculation needs to stop. Racism isn't just the N word folks.
I’m not sure how you can miss someone who won’t go the f*ck away.
Bi*ch, that's Bill Burr.
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Liberals should just buy this as an ad
“I f’cking hate the carbon tax……” 👇👇👇👇#AxeTheTax #carbontax #PierrePoilievre @PierrePoilievre #Conservatives
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“You see how that sounds Mary?” Never gets old. 😂😂😂
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this is my evening now, sorry
It’s always gonna be this one. Once she starts making goose honks… no matter how shitty my mood is, I’m giggling like an idiot.
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March 12
this one
This is so fucking funny oh my god
I’m really happy whenever this article I wrote has a chance to re-emerge like a beautiful butterfly who fucking hates Andrew Tate
The guy who shot Ronald Reagan keeps announcing concerts only for them to be cancelled once the venue finds out he shot Ronald Reagan
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Even the hitman they hired was probably like “guys it’s gonna be pretty obvious who did this”
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remember when Lockheed Martin invented guitars fuck this festival
The defense industry has historically been a proving ground for many of the systems we rely on today. These institutions are often leaders in emerging technologies, and we believe it’s better to understand how their approach will impact our lives.
He. Is. Smiling. While. Holding. An. Autographed. Photo. Of. A. Murder. Victim. Because he’s a sociopath.
Nothing to see here, folks. Just a run-of-the-mill shot of a smiling ex-president grotesquely posing with a photo of a tragic victim of violence he thought appropriate to autograph.
Him denying any groupie babies behind the grave is hilarious I'm sorry
Despite not having any children, Matthew Perry indicated in his will that any children he had were not entitled to an inheritance.
Last night we were on track to be asleep on time and then, there in the dark, my husband asked what the hell is going on with Kate Middleton
If this is truly another manipulated photo, it will open the floodgates.
Just throwing my 2 pence in the ring here. It’s clearly the same photo. They need to just do better, or just tell us what’s going on…. #photoshop #KateGate #katemiddleton
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i feel sorry for people not on this site. my sister is sending me instagram reels about kate's mother's day photo being from her vogue cover. oh hun we've already theorized that and debunked it and moved on. she's dead now. you will learn that in a week.
March 13
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Hey, Rolling Stone! Plan B isn’t abortion, so the “despite” language here is weird!
Olivia Rodrigo’s St. Louis Concert Hands Out Morning After Pills Despite State Ban on Abortion More: rollingstone.com/music/music-ne…
Huge fumble by Disney. National Treasure 3 could have 0% on Rotten Tomatoes and so long as the trailer has Nic Cage say something insane like "FDR's wheelchair isn't just a wheelchair, it's a map" I am there opening night.
Nicolas Cage says ‘NATIONAL TREASURE 3’ is not happening. “If you want to find treasure, don't look at Disney... it's not there.” (Source: screenrant.com/national-treas…)
America you have two choices this November
Dwayne Johnson being contractually obligated to never lose in a fight makes this clip so much funnier because he can't handle it 😭
You mean it wasn’t undocumented immigrants?! No way!
Remember all those smash-and-grab videos of store theft? Now meet the suburban housewife and her husband behind an $8 million nationwide shoplifting ring. 😏
It takes a lot to be the least likable former Packers quarterback
Potential VP candidate Aaron Rodgers reportedly claimed Sandy Hook shooting ‘never happened,’ parents were ‘actors’ dlvr.it/T42Lhz
Let me write a sketch for Gosling. It’ll be in roughly 90 min and have Russell Crowe in it.
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Timothéss of Chalamendeley
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They’re banning tik tok because we’re getting too close to figuring out where Kate is
Man that's crazy. So have you heard of this thing called Facebook
"Imagine you woke up tomorrow morning and you saw a news report that China had distributed 100 million sensors around the United States... That's precisely what TikTok is," Klon Kitchen, who worked in the U.S. intelligence community, said in 2020. cbsn.ws/3VivgxE
One of my favorite Tiktok trends are those musical ones that ends up having no right goin' so hard
Literally every app does this stuff
“The Chinese Communist Party can send push notifications to 170 million Americans from their favorite app” really should be the end of the debate
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I'm not sure we all fully grasp that there's a big room where old people yell nonsense at each other and that's how we get laws
"This is not an attempt to ban TikTok. It's an attempt to make TikTok better. Tic-Tac-Toe. A winner. A winner." -- Rep. Pelosi
Definitely unrelated...
BREAKING: The House has passed a bill to ban TikTok nationwide. The bills passed by a vote of 352-65 and will go to the Senate next. The app has more than 150 million users in the US.
They’ve been talking about banning TikTok for years but they only actually got the support together for a ban once people started using it to talk about what’s happening in Gaza. Even if you don’t care about TikTok it’s an enormous assault on free speech using Red Scare logic
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March 14
“I’m a Minneapolis based pilot for Delta airlines.” “Tell me what a typical workweek is like for you as a stewardess.”
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Bi girls with boyfriends be like I’m socially gay but fiscally straight
Call me a mad conspiracy theorist but the biggest red flag happened before any of the WHERE'S KATE hysteria started. The Mirror published a story criticising her in January. By morning they'd changed the names and photos and suddenly it was about Harry.
Kate getting Meghaned, who herself was Dianaed.
Kate Middleton dubbed 'chaos-bringer of humiliation and mockery' as 'shining star' fades dailystar.co.uk/news/latest-ne…
my favorite kate middleton tweets so i don’t have to bookmark everything, an ongoing thread 🧵
They should do this with the Red Green Show.
Jason Reitman’s ‘SNL 1975’ starring Gabriel LaBelle, Cooper Hoffman and Rachel Sennott has begun filming. The film is based on the real-life behind the scenes accounts of the opening night of Saturday Night Live.
Happy Crack Mayor Episode Day to those who celebrate
This Thursday... it’s the episode you’ve been waiting for. Don’t miss this one. #LawandOrderToronto #CriminalIntent Thursday at 8/7c on @City_tv or stream it on Citytv+
Trump is supposed to do a rally in Ohio for Moreno this Saturday! 😂😂😂
When you're such a homophobe you have to clarify that you were just talking about cannibalism.
Years later, I’m still sorry about this little mishap, @AndyRichter. #ThrowbackThursday
pic.x.com/aKn7cfOt8k
This thing entering while I'm taking a shit and accidentally circumcising me
Self driving building Janitor. Cleans all bathrooms in a multistory building… Unassisted.
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I can't stop giggling over this one kate middleton theory i read: "Maybe she's setting a boundary"
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Jennifer Lopez Cancels Multiple Dates on 'This Is Me... Now' Tour Amid Weak Ticket Sales variety.com/2024/music/new…
Here’s Harper talking about implementing a price on carbon. He thought it was a great idea. But his plan didn’t include a rebate for Canadians like Trudeau’s does. Harper was going to let you pay, collect billions of dollars and then run off with it. Conservative #ConmanSense.
Conservatives don't hate the carbon tax, they just call it "Carbon Pricing" and Harper was all in favour of it. True facts are easy to find. #carbontax in 2008 till now.