Learn How To Apply Your Corpse Paint Properly

Learn How To Apply Your Corpse Paint Properly
How many times have you been on your way to an Enslaved gig and thought, "Oh my, he totally has his corpse paint on all wrong. Is that an inverted cross or a target for semen? And the scowl lines make him look like the puppet from the Saw movies. What did he use? Plaster Of Paris and some axle grease? He looks like an Albino turd covered in burn marks."

Thankfully, before any more of you make the fashion faux pas of leaving home - or Beelzebub forbid - step into another folk metal show looking like something the cat didn't drag in, the fine folks at Metal Injection have unearthed this delightful instructional video on the dos and don'ts of corpse paint application.

Posted by a Canadian girl - see, an intelligent woman providing valuable highlighting tips - who "loves Metal and American muscle cars," her video claims the process will help one "achieve a black metal corpse paint using acrylic paint" in approximately 30 minutes and at less than $20.

For those out there who don't appreciate this woman's kind-hearted assistance in how to appear evil on a budget, she states (and we sic wholeheartedly):

To those 'know-it-all' youtubers who'll complain about 'that' being mainstream, well I did this video because I was receiving a lot of messages about how I did my corpse paint in my other vid. I also noticed that a lot of ppl were messing their CP completly ('those' , are the funny ridiculous ones) and ppl were making fun of them (cauz they ended up looking like KISS, a clown, or ...dani filth). So this 'how to' vid gives tricks about how to look 'grim' and to avoid messing ur corpse paint ...thats it.

Note to the rest of the world: this is not how all Canadian girls act. It's, in fact, much cooler than the plethora of generic beer-swilling, Kenora dinner jacket (that's a plaid lumberjack coat to non-Canucks) and white tube sock-wearing, Tragically Hip-listening miscreants out there that further sully our good nature and taste.

You think we're joking here but stop by the Exclaim! office one day.

And view a few of what she would define as the KISS/Dani Filth contingent here: