Sabrina Carpenter spent 2024 exceeding expectations in every way. At the beginning of the year, she was just another ex-Disney kid trying to make it as an adult, but she instantly catapulted herself into the A-list with the addictive "Espresso." Subsequent singles and the album Short n' Sweet continued her surprising ascent after a decade spent grinding it out.
Carpenter's Netflix holiday special, A Nonsense Christmas, doesn't exceed expectations. Instead, it hits the usual beats of a seasonal variety show, doing just barely enough to raise some festive cheer before instantly being forgotten.
In keeping with Carpenter's raunchy persona, the 50-minute special largely serves as a vehicle for Christmas-themed innuendos, with endless jokes about stockings being "hung" and "packages" being huge. Any slightly racy Christmas song, like "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" or "Santa Baby," is dutifully performed.
The non-stop randiness is curiously sexless yet quite charming, as A Nonsense Christmas does comedy better than it does music. A musical skit co-starring Kyle Mooney and Jillian Bell, about how Carpenter doesn't know what to give her boring brother-in-law for Christmas, could have easily been an above-average SNL sketch, while Quinta Brunson and Cara Delevingne show up in a cute riff on A Christmas Carol, with a sexy Scrooge being haunted by the women he ghosted.
Musically, however, A Nonsense Christmas breezes past forgettably, as Carpenter far outshines most of her celebrity guests. Kali Uchis does "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" in mush-mouthed cursive (it's 2024 — can people please stop singing like that?), while Shania Twain gamely over-sings "Santa Baby" and tries to turn it into a good song through brute force (it's still not). Tyla looks cool wearing a gigantic bow as a dress, but I had to look it up to remember what she performed (it was a forgettable "This Christmas"). The bland soul pop of Carpenter's original holiday tunes (from last year's fruitcake EP) sound like they were designed to be ignored in a shopping mall in December.
The only guest who matches Carpenter's charisma or vocal chops is Chappell Roan, who swoops in for a short but effective "Last Christmas." Roan doesn't add much to the special's comedic flair, but the performance itself is spot on, and a strong testament to why she and Carpenter are leading a new wave of great pop.
Netflix makes a habit out of releasing rote Christmas specials, and while Carpenter isn't the Queen of Christmas like Mariah Carey, at least this one is better than Bill Murray's.