We Apparently Have Shitty Tool Fans to Blame for Drummer Danny Carey's Medical Emergency

We Apparently Have Shitty Tool Fans to Blame for Drummer Danny Carey's Medical Emergency
In life, only three things are certain: death, taxes and Tool fanatics continuing their incessant whining regarding band activity. While it's something one could easily get sick of in a figurative sense, a band newsletter feels the griping has had negative effects on the health of drummer Danny Carey.

In the newsletter, band webmaster Blair McKenzie Blake chalks Tool's near cancellation of a performance at Aftershock Festival up to "negative energy projected by a small percentage of Tool 'fans,'" Drummer Carey was reportedly ill with a staph infection, though played through the performance anyway.

Blake then says the negativity expressed by "fans" is having effects in different areas of the globe. "I don't think any Tool fan wants to be held responsible for beached Sea Lions or rampant bark beetle infestations, and, yet, some continue to whine about a new album and such," he wrote.

"Other tangible effects of some Tool 'fan' negativity that I could have included would be the 'Block Lives Matter' movement started after numerous Lego plastic bricks were senselessly trampled on and/or vacuumed up, the Zika virus, spiders that use their silk to lasso flies, Angry Birds, Monster Truck Rallies, Rapin' for Jesus, and Pumpkin-spiced canned Ravioli," Blake continued. "The other day I even drove by a 'METH CHURCH' (unless the last 5 letters just fell off the sign?). Either way...THE SIGNS ARE UNFOLDING BEFORE OUR VERY EYES."

The rest of the lengthy newsletter can be read here.

Thanks to AlternativeNation for the tip.