Kid Rock Finally Admits He's Not Running for U.S. Senate

"I'm releasing a new album. I'm going on tour too. Are you fucking shitting me?"
Kid Rock Finally Admits He's Not Running for U.S. Senate
A bit of good news came from America's political hellscape today with the announcement that Kid Rock is in fact not running for a seat in the United States Senate.

After news broke earlier this year that the self-proclaimed American badass would make a run, Kid Rock did a serious 180 on his previous claims of running for Senate, dispelling any rumours in conversation with Howard Stern on SiriusXM radio today (October 24). As it turns out, his website KidRockforSenate.com was built to hawk merch to support a forthcoming new record — something that many people on the internet have suspected, despite Kid Rock doing his best to shut down those suspicions.

"Fuck no, I'm not running for Senate. Are you kidding me?" Rock told Stern. "Who couldn't figure that out? I'm releasing a new album. I'm going on tour too. Are you fucking shitting me?"

UPDATE (10/24, 12:20 p.m. EDT): Kid Rock has now announced his new album Sweet Southern Sugar, as well as "Greatest Show on Earth Tour 2018." You can get details on both of those over here.

Naturally, a group of soulless politicians in the U.S. began taking Kid Rock's candidacy seriously, though he had the sense to tell his own team, "no, we're not doing it, but let's roll with it for a while."

Though he still thinks Donald Trump is "the fucking shit," Kid Rock told Stern that "[Trump's] messaging is not the best. And if I get to talk to him again, play golf or whatever, I'd be like, 'Dude, we got to talk about this.'"

Breathe a sigh of relief and take in his comments below.