Untraceable Gregory Hoblit

Untraceable Gregory Hoblit
Untraceable is unbelievable, unrealistic and, to put it bluntly, impossible to watch. The ridiculous story of a Saw-like killer who tortures victims using brutal contraptions while broadcasting their agony over the Internet is riddled with plot holes and "magical” computers that seem to do whatever is necessary to create the most suspense, and the least logic.

Jennifer Marsh (Diane Lane) is a FBI computer expert and a member of the Computer Crimes Taskforce. When an anonymous and untraceable hacker kills innocent people using elaborate torture devices that get increasingly painful based on how many users are logged on to his site, Jennifer is assigned to track down the madman and stop him. When the killer sets his sights on the FBI agents after him, Jennifer and her team must figure out a way to stop him before one of them becomes his next victim.

The film’s incoherent techno babble — designed to confound people who still refer to the Internet as "the information superhighway” — will infuriate anyone who has ever so much as plugged in a power cord. Sadly, we have come to expect Hollywood computers to act in ways that our computers never have, but what is unexpected are several glaring continuity errors this film feels no need to explain. Maybe the DVD will include some of the scenes that fill in the missing pieces, but the theatrical release will leave you scratching your head.

In the ultimate act of unintentional irony, a film about the proliferation of disturbing video available on the Internet isn’t even worth downloading illegally. Like the killer website in the film, if people watch Untraceable, they will be accomplices to a heinous Hollywood crime. You’re better off staying at home and watching YouTube. (Sony)