Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie Gisaburo Sugii

If you have nostalgia for that fighting game of yore, this film might bring back fond and tearful memories. All others need not apply, especially in this uncut and "off the hook” edition. Apparently, ace fighters are being rounded up by the "drugs and weapons” syndicate Shadowloo, brainwashed and sent out to kill important enemies of the organisation’s nefarious cause. This means a lot of people with strange haircuts had better be on the lookout when they’re not beating the crap out of each other in thoroughly ludicrous battles that hardly ever even take place in the street. There are a variety of international locations (with their attendant ethnic stereotypes) and a group of cyborg spies that are remarkable in their conspicuousness in gathering info, but precious little that anyone over the age of 13 will find remotely interesting. A little internet digging revealed that there’s actually a rabid audience for this movie that’s relieved at getting the uncut goods, and there is a bit of skin and a tiny amount of blood to perhaps justify their delight. But kids, this is a Street Fighter II movie, not The Magnificent Ambersons, and there’s no covering up the fact that crap extended is still crap. Fans can perhaps amuse themselves by comparing the relative merits of the UK and Japanese cuts — while the original language version has a stolid, serious translation and is two minutes longer, the UK cut is more florid and has percolating music by KMFDM. You could choose your version and perhaps be disappointed, or you could watch both one after another, or you could maybe get out of the house more. Your call. (Anchor Bay)