Crank

Crank is a film driven by testosterone and the will to get fucked up on every stimulant and destroy everyone and everything in sight. It’s mind-bogglingly preposterous from beginning to end, but man is it ever fun to watch. Jason Statham — the new king of senseless violence — is Chev Chelios, a hit man who wakes up with the fatal "Beijing cocktail” in his system, courtesy of rival Ricky Verona (Jose Pablo Cantillo). Thanks to a cell phone consultation with his "doctor” friend (Dwight Yoakam), Chev learns he can survive long enough to exact vengeance if he continually boosts his adrenaline — meaning he’s going to have to ingest a whole lot of narcotics and kick a number of asses to stay alive. It never lets up either, which is essentially why the film avoids the trappings of the standard Seagal and Van Damme fluff. Statham chops off an arm and quips, "How frickin’ awesome was that?”; he throws a disgruntled cabbie to the ground and yells, "Al Qaeda!” and old women jump on and beat the visible minority; and he uses devices such as a defibrillator and a waffle iron to shock himself back into gear. Statham is an unstoppable destructive force with enough British tough guy charm to win anyone over. Hell, he can even coax airy girlfriend Eve (Amy Smart) into some not-so-intimate lovemaking before the eyes of all of Chinatown. The bar for non-stop thrill rides has just been raised. A nice complement to the DVD is the "Crank’d Out Mode,” an interesting concept that takes commentary to another level. Using a picture within a picture feature, it allows Neveldine and Taylor to go beyond simply explaining everything. The little box shows interviews with some of the many producers and visits the set to show the making of certain scenes while the movie rolls. It’s distracting, no doubt, but at the same time how much attention does one actually give the film while a commentary is running? Hopefully this is a trend that will catch on. The only other extra is an option to watch Crank in "family-friendly” audio mode. It’s a laugh to have this on such a hyper-violent DVD, but the directors introduce it as nothing more than a brazen, TV-ready, money-making scheme. The fact that they miss the "Fuck You” printed in bold letters on a DVD Chelios watches in the opening scene though immediately proves that TBS won’t be calling just yet. Hearing the villain say he’s the "motherfrickin’ cheese of sick” though is pretty damn funny. (Maple)