March 13
Set your clocks an hour ahead as a reminder that we're in control of nothing, but especially time.
— Anne T. Donahue (@annetdonahue) March 13, 2016
You had one job, Larry David. https://t.co/33W0TEDzrW
— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) March 13, 2016
March 14
Bruce Willis always looks like he's eating an overripe banana and trying to prove to you that he's still enjoying it pic.twitter.com/SfAsYwx4jy
— Matt O'Brien (@matt_obrien) March 14, 2016
One of the most male-dominated fields no one is talking about is cereal mascots.
— Sophia Benoit (@1followernodad) March 14, 2016
the internet is magic pic.twitter.com/dhPGxVCNFq
— Ziwe (@Ziweeee) March 14, 2016
March 15
I used to think I could control ducks with my mind but it turns out ducks & I just have very similar ideas about what stuff ducks should do
— Jacy Catlin (@ieatanddrink) March 15, 2016
When I click link that claims "completely destroys" I expect to see "completely destroys", not "casually dismisses" https://t.co/jUQofrDXRi
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) March 15, 2016
Indiana Jones and the Shitty Buffet at 4 PM
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) March 15, 2016
Fitting that Marco Rubio aborted his campaign not because it was it was his choice but because some men decided for him.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) March 16, 2016
March 16
When it's all said and done, OJ Simpson will have contributed far more to television than he ever did to football.
— Neal Brennan (@nealbrennan) March 16, 2016
March 17
Trump owes it all to his diverse supporters. #LNSM pic.twitter.com/8KkNLpLyat
— Late Night (@LateNightSeth) March 17, 2016
The Dropkick Murphys are currently practicing yoga on a pier in South Boston.
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) March 17, 2016
I admire people with conviction. Actually, admire's a strong word.
— Mark Forward (@MarkForwardd) March 17, 2016
March 18
Who wants to break it to Daredevil that New York is incredibly safe?
— Jeff Loveness (@JeffLoveness) March 18, 2016
My flight seatmate asked me where I am flying to. Always good to compare answers on these things.
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) March 18, 2016
